I ducked into the freezer, leaving the door open behind me - conserving electricity just wasn't a priority during the dinner rush. It was a wonder that we had a dinner rush, given what passed for "food" here.

I picked up a bag of "authentically meatilicious!" burgers from the back of the freezer, and a bulk pack of bacon from the shelf above the buns and rolls. I checked carefully to make sure the bacon was unopened - there were three mostly-empty pa