Plan B

You don't know problems.

Not until you've had to wake up after two hours of stressful sleep to get up early enough to call in to work and tell them you're not going to be in. After that, go pick up the girl you had sex with last night, even though you've only known her for three weeks to take her to Planned Parenthood because the condom broke. You don't know problems until you've had to lie to her parents' faces that you are taking their little princess to breakfast and not to go get a perscription for Plan B. Now, picture if you can that you work with her brother who is two years older than you and hang with him all the time. He knows you, he trusts you and he sees you at his house at 8:30 am and then leaves for work, for the same shift you called in for. Now if thats not quite enough for you yet, those two little pills are very, very expensive. When you're budget is stretched between, Rent, Tuition, Gas, Food and Bills; there comes the expense that you cannot afford to forgo paying.

Now, there are side effects to this pill because it is a hormone overdose that forces a woman's reproductive system to malfunction in order to halt conception. She's got nausea that you blame on "food poisoning" to keep her parents from catching on to anything wrong. Shes moody and obviously not feeling good, shes running on less sleep than you got. Shes terrified of becomming pregnant and so are you but no one can find anything out. So you sit together, cuddled up on the couch in silence, staring vacantly at the entertainment center ignoring daytime TV and telling yourself that the money spent today and the money never made at work are well worth the expense of not having a child. You talk to yourself in your head because you can't talk to her about it right there, her parents are sitting by you, oblivious to everything but the re-runs of the Montel Jordan Show playing way too loud. Eventually you both pass out because of stress and exhaustion and when you wake up and get a moment to yourselves after leaving for dinner, you just sit in your car with her, crying in eachother's arms for the better part of an hour. Nervously watch her take the second and final pill, knowing that shes going to feel five times worse than she already is as soon as it kicks in. You're troubles aren't over until you got back to her place to watch a movie and curl up together to pass out once more. In the middle of the night, her brother, your friend, her protecter, stumbles through the back door in a drunken state and pauses for a moment to see you both holding one another outstretched on the living room couch. He shrugs it off because he trusts you and never gives it another thought as he heads in for the night to pass out. Uneasy rest and a pit in your stomach that adrenaline has been making since an hour before the condom broke drive you to peel your sticky skin off of hers and tell her you need to leave. Afraid to be alone but unwilling to have you miss another day at work, you remove her reluctantly wanting arms and head home, your head buzzing with emotion and stress you don't really need that much of right now either.

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This was my day. I needed to vent badly and I trust you guys not to tell anyone.

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Wow man.
That's bad. That competes, if not beats my lieukemia cancer last year. I trusted my problem with the Legionnaires because you guys were my "friends" away from my friends. I felt that if anywhere was a place to vent, it was to this very site.

I know exactly how you feel. The stress that you're afraid to put on other people. The stress that you put on yourself. Yet, the only pain I felt was cancer itself. I didn't have to worry about another person. Also, my parents were there for me. If you find the strength to do so, tell your parents that you're worried. When I went to the doctor, I was scared as shit to tell my mom and dad. I knew I shouldn't have, but I started doing drugs to releive my pain. It's been about a year and a half, and i'm still addicted to heroine. I also do coccane about 6 times a day, and at night I get drunk off Listerine before I have my bedtime cigarette. When I can get enough cash together, I also do Meth. I beg of you, please do NOT turn to drugs to find releif. It's the one and only thing that to this day that I regret doing. Drugs and smoking are the last place that anyone under pressure would want to go. It's so not worth all of the crap that I put up with today. Don't waste your money on drugs, you have more important things to do with it.

I will do all that I can do, pray for you and your girlfriend.
Thanks for the support guys.

We're talking about it together a lot today. We want to be together too much to consider calling the whole thing off after this but we've set some ground rules. No Alcohol. No Sex. Those are the big ones that I wholeheartedly agree with, no questions asked. Well if I don't post much, you'll forgive me for tending to much more important matters. I'm glad I can turn here for some support and opinions and strength. I'd like to let everyone know right here and now that I'm pledging myself to do the same for every one of you.

If you get a chance, research what the song attatched is about. Its too horrifically fitting for me to have ignored and I'm sad to be able to relate to this.
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BTW, don't trust Trojan Brand Condoms. I already threw all of mine out.
Crayven Securities, Inc. | MechWarrior
Sorry to hear about that man - I certainly hope things get alot better for you in this new year.
Well it looks like everything is going to be ok. We're both fine, no psychological damage, thats a plus. I guess we were just scared, thats all. Still we're waiting for her period in a few weeks before uncrossing any fingers. I'm quite optimistic about the outcome though but if it doesn't pan out, I don't have any problems with taking responsibility and preparing for fatherhood. (God forbid.)